its unfortunate, when the time comes and you realize that some people in your lifes journey, ends now. its a shame when you learn that most of your friends are what aristotle would call "friendships of utilities". you've been used, and you were just thought you were close because you had a good time while with them. the worst, is when you come across people who are about 5 years your senior, and they still have about 10 years maturing to do. you do your thing, you think its all great, but then wait a minute...you realize that people can be manipulative, lying wastes of life. people become intimidated of girls who know what they want, have an education, and arent afraid of confrontation. once they realize that whatever game they had planned to play has been blown, they immediately become quick to be the hugest ass hole they can...but guys, we see through that too. its a defense mechanism. (and...a little embarrassing to say the least). listen, i mean i know i happen to be a lot more educated that you, and lets sayyy i have direction, and my youth, but dont take your anger out on me. all i did was trust you, which was a MASSIVE mistake.
what bothers me the most is the manipulation people can be capable of. how do you sleep at night? knowing you led someone to believe you were one thing, when you really are something so completely different? its sad to me. further proves my point that you can only trust yourself. i once heard a dear friend say to me: "i PROMISE by then end of the year i will change your view on humanity." well, dear friend of mine, you did. i realized that everyone is the same. you can tell yourself you are different, that you are a great person, but youre not. youre lost. but you should most definitely find yourself before you wreck anyone elses view on personhood.
i thank you, dear friend of mine, for opening my eyes to what truly had to be seen. it's nothing but time and a face that you lose, i chose to feel it, and you couldnt choose.
you can feed yourself to the wolves, youre doing a good job of it already. <3