Monday, December 27, 2010

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Pre-Christmas Eve Obscurity

Let's be real here, shall we? We all know that those feel good songs only stay in my system for the time being. Here are the real chord pullers that evoke an emotion in me, and please, let them pull something dark out of you. It's screaming to come out, don't silence it. You know it's in there.

Accept it.

Massive Attack - Red Light (Clark Remix)

#1 song able to take over me. You know when there is that song that has just the right touch that evokes the darkest emotion in you? This is it. Massive Attack has its way of creeping right into my soul and pulling out the blackest of the black. 1:55, hide your kids.

Blood Letting - Blood Warrior

It's a more upbeat version of a song I would want to die to.

Massive Attack VS Aled Jones - Tear Drops In Air

Sick operatic vocals AND Massive Attack??? Why I do believe I've found paradise.

Dave.i.d - Marvel

It took me about six tries to get this mp3 correct. That's when you know you really want a song. This beat is illicit. It's going to get you arrested. Use with caution.

The Do - Slippery Slope

I was first attracted to the video. The singer is a beautiful looking model with abstract images surrounding her. Who wouldn't be interested, right? The jungle-esque beat is what pulled me in. And she has such a new age 40's sounding voice. I love, I love.

Man-u-Ill - Cinderella Man

I know the guy who does the beat for this song! Old time close family friend. He's rad, and this is something he's been working with for a while. It sounds something like Zion I meets Fort Minor. I totally dig. And it touches on a current situation, this recession we are going through...and they do it all over an ill beat. Politics and music? How Rolling Stone of them...

Jamie Woon - Blue Truth

Second fave next to the first one I posted. The beat pulls at something I have in my body. I don't know what it is but it pretty much controls my every move. It's deep, it's dark...and it's on my blog. Take advantage.

Leap, Ballerina, Leap...

"The only way to be perfect is to allow chaos and madness into your life."
- Darren Aronofsky.
I read this in an interview with Natalie Portman in the latest Vogue. And it hit such a chord with me.
I saw Black Swan (Aronofsky's latest film including schizophrenic ballerinas and eating disorders galore) and it was one of those movies that when I walked out of it, I thought I was Nina (Portman's character in the movie.) There is something deep and dark about ballet that most people aren't aware of. It's a continuous battle with yourself. Your weight, your height, your posture, your technique, your flexibility, and quite frankly...your beauty. Aronofsky portrayed the forbidden side of it perfectly in the movie.
"When Nina becomes the swan in the movie, it's the kind of transcendent self loss that only artists know." - Vogue. Maybe this is what attracted me. There IS a self loss and self denial that artists know, and up until now it has done nothing but silence me. Everyone that I have become somewhat close to has forbidden this sense of self loathing, because they don't understand. They think that we're being too dramatic, that we can't control our emotions. This is what makes me write. This is what creates art. This is what inspires musicians. This IS my sense of transcendence. Accept it in us, it's what makes us, US.

I don't know what it is that I give off, that makes people want to silence me. But I suppose it's the previous.
I've had enough of it, and you know what? I have a voice, and no matter what YOU think should come out of it, I'm going to use it.

Vanity Meets Despair

I finally saw one of my long lost bestest friends ever two nights ago!!! We had a sweet sleepover (bout freaking time) and she took some dope pics for a scholarship project. She rules at photography.
I look like my mother in the 80's in the last pics.

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Tunage Catch Up

Okay this took me way too long to post, sorry, but I was sent this mixtape from a Moda Music rep during finals. It's a new December Mixtape from Tom Staar, featuring that gem from Shake Aletti 'Dancefloor', and other awesome shit from Tiga and that 'I Am Europe' song that everyone is obsessed with. Put together quite well actually, plus...he's bangin' to look at.

Tom Staar - December 2010 Mixtape

And to add to my feel good mood, I thought that I would post these little happy gems I previously found during finals which helped calm me down every time I had a break down.

The Dandy Warhols - We Used to Be Friends

Thanks to me and my siblings who have done nothing at nights except watch all episodes of Veronica Mars.

Belle and Sebastian - I Want the World to Stop

I'm usually not a huge fan of Belle and Sebastian, but I guess this time I am. Huh...

Carla Bruni - Quelqu'un M'a Dit

Okay not only is Carla Bruni absolutely beautiful, but her voice is angelic and she is 46% of the reason why I am learning French. Maybe if I can get myself to be able to have her pronunciation...something good will happen to me.

Morning After Girls - Alone

DINGDINGDING. winner! Obsessing over this song for the past couple of weeks. I don't know if it's because the lyrics are sung to match the beat, but it makes me feel absolutely delighted.

This is my off season for depression...YAY

(pic by

MERRRY CHRISTMASSSS BABYYY. One of the only times I'm ever actually happy is in the season of Christmas. Maybe that's why I have seasonal depression...
Anyway, I'm finally home, finals have gone to hell, and I finally can blog ! HipHipHooray.
I spent my first full day at home making cookies with my siblings, fighting with each other, and decorating the house. I am so happy to be home and I don't think I will want to leave my family ever again.
Here's some of my favorite Christmas music, and I hope that you can enjoy it JUST as much as I do.

Trans Siberian Orchestra - Christmas Eve in Sarajevo

I saw Trans Siberian Orchestra last year with the fam, and it was way rad. Orchestral music makes me feel sooo happy and seasonal and makes me want to put on my dancin shoez.

5oh! - Home Alone (Christmas Dubstep)

MERRY DUBSTEP. Home Alone warppp.

Amy Grant - Breath of Heaven

She like...cheated on her husband or something, so it sort of takes away of the innocence of Mary in the song. But it's still totally good.

Charlotte Church - Dream A Dream (Elysium)

Sick orchestra in the background. She burned out but...what can ya do...

Trans Siberian Orchestra - Nutcracker Suite

Nutcracker mashup. Enough said.

Monday, December 6, 2010

These seem about right...
(via Yvan Rodic)

Turning the lights out, burning the candle, MIRRORS GUNNA FALL TONIGHT.

I honestly can't believe I just found time to put up new music. I've had these bad boys on call for a day or so now, I just could not find a solid moment to upload them. This is one of thee most stressful weeks I've ever had in my life. Since my other university shut down, I'm riding on this year for a killer gpa to save my life, since this gpa is the only one that's going to matter. I am busting my damn ass at this school (which was just rated 3rd in academics for Catholic Universities behind Notre Dame and Georgetown...whaaaat.)This weekend I forced myself to find time to search out new jamz, and I think I found some decent gems. This music is honestly my saving grace right now. PLEASE enjoy the beats.

Natalia Kills - Mirrors (FrankMusic Obsidian Overkill Remix)

She's getting to me. She really is, and it's killing me. I can't help it! These remixes are thee guiltiest pleasure that I've indulged in in quite some time. H.E.L.P.

Hoodie Allen - You Are Not a Robot

It's alright. I just love Marina and the Diamonds and I'm a sucker for a good hip hop overthrow.

iSQUARE - Hey Sexy Lady (SKRILLEX remix)

Okay so you know my feelings on dubstep and how it has to be legitimately raw for me to get excited. The original to this one is super fun to dance to, but this remix is SO killer. You're going to have to shower after the first drop, it's THAT diirty.

Faithless vs Rihanna - Only Insomnia in the World

Insomnia used to be one of my fave's in techno tunage. Then they pulled this bad mix on us? LIKE.

Natalia Kills - Wonderland (Peace Treaty Dubstep Remix)

Awh man, here we go again. SO GOOD. I have 3 really inappropriate choreo'd dances to these, and I cannot wait to find someone who will do them with me.

BoA - Adrenaline

Excuse my ignorance, but I honestly don't know what language this is in. Korean or Japanese is what I'm going to aim at. Anyway, the beat is dope and once again...I start dancing every time it's on.

Saturday, December 4, 2010


I have a friend who is a KICK ASS ballerina. She just came back from dancing in Russia at the Vaganova Ballet Academy as one of the youngest Americans or only American or something really significant...either way, she's back in the states dancing for the Boston Ballet. ...And she is one of the most beautiful, delicate, (skinniest) ballerina's I have ever laid my eyes on. I am in quite the holiday spirit, so I LOVE watching the Nutcracker and Swan Lake as ballet's. For some reason ballet gets me in a Christmas mood. Probably because when I used to be a ballerina that was how I knew the holidays were around the corner. Our Nutcracker rehearsals and performances were some of my favorite dancing memories.
Anyway, check this bad chick dancing Sugar Plum in this Nutcracker piece I creepily found on the interwebs hehehe. Keenan, if I'm embarrassing you, I'm sorry.

(Check her feet out at around 2:18....definition of ballerina feet, so beautiful)

Oh, and she models.

Some girls get all the luck.

Thursday, December 2, 2010

Intelligence is running RAMPANT in America...

I'm currently writing a paper on TS Eliot's 'The Waste Land' right now, well, CLEARLY taking a break, but I totally just had a revelation on how shitty our intelligence is becoming. I decided to find a recording of Eliot reading the poem, because I find that you can gain so much more from the poem if you hear how it is supposed to be read. Well, I listened...and listened again, and then went through my favorite parts and, well, I listened again. After I finally let it end, I went and turned my itunes back on, and...well I'll refrain from saying what song came on, but I immediately became embarrassed. This moment it really hit me; these lyrics are dumb as shit.
We listen to it because the beats are rad, raw, dirty, make us want to do illicit things...and I'm the FIRST person to admit that even if the lyrics suck, the beat is what gets me. However, it's making us idiots. After reading poems and books from these guys, honestly, there is SO much more out there than what we expose ourselves to. There is SO much we can learn, and to think it's just from a bunch of single words put together...and the fact that JUST that can teach you so much, it's unreal. It's not only music either, it's culture. I was having a talk with one of my best friends the other day about how unbelievably hard it is for us to find guys attractive nowadays because they are damn unintelligent. They don't read, they don't listen to decent music, they aren't religious... And no, that's not fair to say, I don't mind if they aren't religious, but if they know NOTHING about anything, those things are what's important in life. Not drinking, smoking, partying...that is just so empty. And trust me, I went through that phase just a bit ago, and I found nothing fulfilling in it. Not one thing. The things I find pleasure in talking about, some guys/people don't even know what the hell I'm saying. I had a run in with someone my friends set me up with, and I can't even begin how painful it was. He had a beautiful tattoo of a Latin quote that is found in some of my FAVORITE poetry and literature...and he couldn't reference one. NOT ONE. Frustrating to say the least.
I feel like I've become a snob, but I really don't mean to be. I think I just...oh I don't know, as a good friend put once 'I never thought my head and body matched up well.' It's true. They haven't. And I honestly believe I will be spending my life alone. I specifically blame my Literature professor from last year for this. He gave me an excerpt from an Allan Bloom book on the corruption of the human mind, and knowing that I happily obsess over music, he had me read the section in which Bloom negated any happy feeling I got from just listening to my tunes. Thanks a lot, Professor. I've now become a complete snob and I really don't think any guy enjoys hanging out with me. It sucks that I am attracted to philosophy, poetry and music. IT SUCKS, IT SUCKS, IT SUCKS. I think I may just stop reading and start doing what normal people do...and join a sorority and dye each others hair and beer pong. Three guys came up to me at the bar the other night, and one of them asked me what I wanted to do after school, so I told him, because I have goals in my life. His response: "whoa weird, so you're like ambitious or whatever..." and then tuned out. UH, YEAH I have ambitions I'M A HUMAN. Nope. Next guy: "So what do you do in your spare time when youre not studying?" Me: Well I have a music blog and I love to write and read and find new music, what do you do?" Him: "oh, I workout." Fail. Next one...became so utterly confused on the fact I knew more about his tattoo than he did, that he honestly told someone I was too smart (which is obviously an INSULT nowadays) and left me and started hanging on these two blondes with fake boobs.
Like, IM NOT EVEN SMART. AT ALL. I just pay attention to details and live life in awareness.

Hello one bedroom apartment in NYC with 27 cats.