BPM: Beats Per Month

Rusko - Everyday (Boyfriend Remix)



I'm over dubstep. Like for real. But I like this song because it makes me feel good and I smile very big on the inside when I listen to this. I can also picture myself dancing somewhere super sunny with a lot of people to this as well, and that is exactly what I need at this point.

Ke$ha - Blow (R1 Cirkut Edit)



You all know how I feel about Kesha, she sucks majorly bad. However, the beat of this song is quite addicting, and this killer freaking remix I found is even better. Who the hell is R1 Cirkut, and why do I not have more of their music???

Robyn - Call Your Girlfriend (Sultan & Ned Shepard Remix)



Okay I uploaded a preview of this song about a month ago, and it finally dropped! YAY. The music blogs are streaming another remix, I can't think of whose at the moment, but I am a fan of this Sultan & N. Shepard mix. Perfect amount of drop, danciness and the original vocals.

Taio Cruz - Believe in Me Now (Produced by Swedish House Mafia)



Ahhh Taio Cruz, you guilty little pleasure you. The only attraction I had to this song was the fact that my friend who has killer music taste sent it to me, and the fact SHM produced the track itself. You can hear the SHM influence throughout the song, which makes the song really dancelike. Approved.

Rihanna & Britney Spears - S&M



My boyfriend and I belt the hell out of this song in the car. Sorry boyfriend, exposed. And now with Britney on the track? YAY! Anything with B. Spears is an A in my book. However, this song is exceptionally dirty and I feel like I have to go to confession every time I listen to it.

Lost in Reverie

A lot of times while I'm lying down or just sitting around I get lost in reverie.
Most of those times I am day dreaming about my imaginary worlds I wish existed.
There are a plethora of places that I get lost in, the atmosphere usually depending on my mood. They are usually colour based, either light pink and white with lace accents or charcoal grey and black chiffon hanging from the windows. The people and music differ between these areas as well, my outfits are always magnificent, and accepted by all people at all times. The music throughout this make believe wonderland is always perfectly fitting, and I can dance or drown throughout it at any time.
Lately I've been getting lost in thoughts ever since I've had to stay for this one class I have to take at school. My boyfriend has left me to go home, my friends are dispersed, my family is back north, and here I am once again, alone with my thoughts.

This could be potentially dangerous, and normally would be, but after a year of complete happiness I think I'm safe. I know how to handle it, I know what to do, I know where to go and that I'm just being selfish.
However, this feeling of loneliness that's cradling me has been missed...

When I was in London, I visited the Tate Modern Museum, and in their Surrealist / Dreamscape level, they were showing this short film by Maya Deren. I found it recently. Amazing.

Maya Deren - Meshes of the Afternoon (1943)

Mondkompf - Day of Anger

Well this is hauntingly satisfying.

Mondkompf - Day of Anger

Britney Spears - Til the World Ends

Whatever, you freaking haters. My love for Brit Brit is out; get over it, or bite me. Not only does this song excite me and makes me dance around my room, BUT it also reminds me of Slave 4 U and that makes me so happy because old Britney is coming back yayyyy. Her dancing is improving since she's had the babies. She still just kinda hops, and her back is semi-stiff but she looks great. ...However there is something different about her face, it's like she's so tired or something, poor thing....she works so hard...

PS if the world was ending like it's supposed to be, I really hope I can have a massive dance party with Britney Spears. Guys wanna join? Let's do it.



And here is thee most kick ass remix of all time. (I'm so dramatic sometimes, ya know?)

Britney Spears - Til The World Ends (CULTURE SHOCK remix)

Anxiety of Female Fatalities

I had to present a critique today on the chapter of 'Anxiety of Authorship' in the book Madwoman in the Attic by Sandra Gilbert and Susan Gubar. They refuted Harold Bloom's patriarchal outlook of male authorship and related it to womens...blah blah blah.
I have been on a feminist rampage for the past couple weeks, I'm not really sure why. Possibly because my sister is acting so unlike herself since she and her boyfriend broke up, and it's really sad to watch such an independent person succumb to such a lousy level of emotion. Maybe it's because I am mad at myself for lightening up and finally liking a boy more than I had expected to. Maybe it's because I realize that I can be just as smart as the pretentious boys in my classroom.
But overall, It's because I am slowly realizing the standards people hold for women.

There is a boy at my school who makes his girlfriend read a book on how to be a housewife and is recommending it to other girls at school.

I just got kicked out of our University's formal for my dress being too short.

I'm too conservative for my friends in the city and the city itself.

I'm too liberal and independent for the Catholic community here.

I get along with everyone, yet I still feel as though I don't belong anywhere.

Why all the standards? Why do I, and women and girls in particular have to act and dress a certain way. Why must they want a housewife wearing long skirts and no makeup with a sandwich in hand here, but a sexually liberal free spirit (who must concede to them or else they are a frigid bitch) elsewhere? Where is there a medium. Why can't I just do what I want without commentary? I suppose it's like that for everyone. Judgments everywhere. And then I pressure myself. I want to be skinny, I want to be tan, I want to be blonde, I want to be smart, I want this and that and play the violins because it never ends and it gets so old.
The Anxiety of Authorship is the same for life. We don't want to put our names on anything because we feel it will never be accepted.

But I still do want to run away, alone, to places like this. And have elephant friends. Only elephant friends...

Pretty Tunage

The Cults - You Know What I Mean



I am totally blanking on where I found this song, but I think right now it's my new favorite. Her voice is so pretty, and the vintage 50's feel of the song makes me feel like I'm at the school dance in Grease. Right? Totally. I want to do a version to this song.

The Sounds - Better Off Dead




Ohhhh The Sounds. The Sounds is actually the band that brought me together with Brittany. Funny story about them, Brit and I met in Urban because we were both meeting my friend Dustin, and then we found out that we could get into The Sounds concert for free cause they were playing at a small venue, and we went, and rocked out, and bonded, and now were the bestest friends awhhh. Anyway, this song is quite different then their normal sound, but I dig. Even though I have some grammatical critiques on the lyric structure but whatever it's cool.

Sade ft. Jay-Z - The Moon and the Sky



This is random. But it's just so pretty and chill. The beat is really cool too, I think if I were to run away by taking a train to somewhere really cool I would play this on my journey. And Jay Z is probably the only real rapper I actually like. I digggg.

Birdy - Skinny Love


Okay I am NOT a fan of covers. Especially when somebody tries to cover a Bon Iver song. But this girls voice! Oh my goodness gracious, she is beautiful, pretty young it seems as well, due to her braces filled mouth in the video which everyone should watch because her vintage lace dress and black boots are totally kickin'.

Crippling Thoughts

My mind has been everywhere the past couple of weeks. School is kicking my ass, graduation is coming up, my future is drawing near, ...and I have a boyfriend, on top of it all.
I'm fearful of graduation. I've finally come to a point in my life where I understand that I can grasp information. I'm not intelligent, but I can get there. And now it's ending. What happens if I forget everything I've learned? That terrifies me.
I wish I had a growing mass of pretense like everyone else here.
Or,
I wish I could trade something for intelligence. My looks, perhaps. Then maybe people would take me seriously, especially when I argue my feminist views. Perhaps if I looked like a Peta loving lesbian then maybe people would listen to what I say.

But this isn't the case.
...Perhaps maybe, the juxtaposition of my blonde hair, slightly large chest and opinionated nature will throw people off.

Ah, which brings me to my next point. I went with my friend who got a tattoo the other day, and as I was waiting in the foyer of this tattoo shop, I opened up a Playboy. (Sorry mom) But I was curious! The only one I had ever seen was one my friend kept on her night stand and it was from like...1960, so it was way vintage. Anyway, I was so disappointed in it. I'm about to get a little vulgar here, so pardon me, but it seemed like an anatomy book to me. Exposition of your entire female body, knowing that some 42 year old sweaty slob is getting off to it in the basement of his house, OR the classified Wall Street business man is doing the same, while his wife is cooking him dinner. Someone explain to me the good that comes from this, because I'm having a hard time seeing it.
Not only that, but the complete exposition of the body isn't sexy. Pictures of woman clothed with a sense of something showing is so much better. Because then you have something left to the imagination, if you put it all out there in tacky ways that Playboy does it, you just look like a ho. Who I then feel really bad for because you must have not had good influences in your life and you are trying to get appraisal from anyone who comes along.
You know?
It's sad.

I have also been thinking about what the hell has happened to me since I've come to this school. Mostly, this semester, and even closer, since I've had this boyfriend.
I'm wearing magenta tonight to a formal dance.
1) I'm going to a formal.
2) My dress is magenta.
I have a Colbie Callaititiat or however you spell her name song in my iTunes that I sing along to, I wear less makeup, I smile here and there, and I'm doing well in school.
Whatthehell.
I'm slowly turning into a borderline normal person, and some of it is a little bit uncomfortable. Now that I think about it, I'm losing all of my street cred. Nobody finds me intimidating anymore, and everyone see's through my comfort.

Dammit Eric. And damn you Ave Maria University for the wonderful friends I've been able to make, your professors who I can sit and talk with for hours on end at the pub, and your education which has helped me so much in my life.

Thank You, God, for allowing this to happen.

Oh my God. OH MY GOD, revelation. Good does come from bad.
Bad doesn't always come from good.

There goes about 40% of my posts.

Pop Central

Nero - Guilt



APC posted the video for this song a couple weeks ago, and it is by far one of the best videos I've seen all year. I was also on a Nero high from Ultra when I heard this song, so I immediately became obsessed.



Kerli - Army of Love (Cherry Cherry Boom Boom Remix)



First time I heard Kerli was a couple years ago, I think my brother showed me her 'Walking on Air' video. She's super weird and pretty and foreign. The video to this song is really cool too, check it out HERE. The Cherry Cherry Boom Boom remix just ads a little something special.

Band of Horses - The Funeral (Butch - Clancy Remix)



Ahhh Band of Horses. They always make me emotional. My bro sent this remix to me via Twitter. Really cool remix, a little bit different then what you would expect, but definitely good.

The Sirens - Don't Let Go



This is like...pop central. But APC had their album for stream a month or so ago, and I recently just found this mp3. The Sirens sound is super girly, lyrics are nothing remotely intelligent, but it's way fun to get ready to when you're going out at night or something of the sort.

Britney Spears - Inside Out



Okay, so I don't think I have blogged any Britney songs before, except for some killer remixes I've come across...but I think it's time I let the world know that...
I'm obsessed with Britney Spears.
I have been since the 4th grade. I have every single one of her albums, hard copy and all, I've memorized every dance to every video, I know every word to every song, and between the ages of 16 and 19 I used to celebrate her birthday, on her birthday.
I know this is really weird to hear, and slightly embarrassing to admit, but she's beautiful. She dances better than any other pop artist, she has been through SO much, and I don't know, she's the damn princess of pop let's give some credit where credits due. I think we all forget the old Britney. Britney pre-My Prerogative, pre-shaved head, pre-Kevin Federline. She was stunning. And now I sound like a creepy stalker so let me just say, I love this new song of hers, her comebacks are ruling all, and we should all praise her.

A simple Refutation.

I promised myself at the start of this blog that I would never: succumb to fighting other blogs, blog about school and issues arising in the student body, and talk about what I had to eat that day.

However, due to a blog post going around school, I feel it's my call to refute an argument I have a hard time agreeing with.

Although Marcellino's point cradles some very poignant issues, (yeah I used his name, whatever) the way he may have went about it with the blame was wrong. We are not to stereotype, judge, blame, or shun anyone. No matter what their lifestyle is, how extremely obnoxious they are, how immature they are, we are never to put anyone down or say they do not belong somewhere. The athletes at this school, ALTHOUGH can be judgmental, rude, annoying and not as religious as you would have hoped, they are all welcome here. I have seen first hand some of the ___ players making fun of kids during lunch. YES I feel like I am in a middle school when I see this and I don't want to be around them. HOWEVER, they aren't 'ruining' the school.
This is a Catholic institution, and although some may be harboring bad feelings about how the athletics SEEM to be taking away from the Catholic vocation of the school, they aren't at all. You're judgment is.

Now, automatically creating assumptions about how the athletes and "partiers" at this school go out, get 'drunk', smoke POT (who calls it that, really now...) and has sex with God knows who, is a completely false JUDGMENT. Haven't we as Catholics learned that by now...we are NOT called to judge?? THATS NOT OUR ROLE. It's God's. Not ours.
We can stay away from people who we don't think would be beneficial to us, but we should never EVER make someone feel unwelcome.
Just to break the mold, let me say that my boyfriend is an athlete, I go to confessions and church and struggle with a lot of issues EVEN THOUGH THAT SHOULDN'T matter so don't judge me, my best friends are what you call the 'partiers' yet, some of my really close group of friends are in the 'pretentious lit crowd' sitting under the outside of the cafe, where I occasionally sit a couple times a week to get my educational fill, and I go the pub and drink with my professors. So what does this mean?
1) I rule, because I'm friends with a lot of different people...
2) It makes YOU more childish and 'high schoolish' blogging and judging people you don't know, and
3) Maybe we should all grow up a bit and just learn to break our molds.

You never know where anyone is coming from, and just because they play a sport does NOT mean that they are douche bags.
Amen.

ULTRA FEST MIAMI 2011

Guess who went to Ultra Fest? ME.
Hands down, it was one of thee best experiences of my life.
Picture a land where you are surrounded by your favorite music, people are dressed exactly how you dress, and you're with some of your best friends in the whole world. People are dancing up and down the streets, the vibe is nothing short of happy and generous, and you can talk to anyone you want with no pre-judgments. The best part of it all: everyone is there for the exact same reason.
I am still completely put in awe by the fact that thousands upon thousands of people from around the world can come together in unison for one sole purpose; music. Whether people were rolling face, tripping balls or completely sober, you are all feeling the unbelievable power of music together. The powerful bonding you experience between the people in the crowd with you makes me want to cry. And I can't even begin to describe the pleasure of being able to experience something like Ultra with my best friends.

We started the day pretty early, we drank a bit, and the first show we went to was Steve Aoki. Imagine starting of your morning with a little live Steve Aoki blasting WARP in your face? I CAN! It was amazing. Then we saw Afrojack who killed it completely, I was up front and center making love with Fedde Le Grand's eyes, I moshed my face off and killed my body at Skrillex, I jammed to Kaskade, Oh and Sander Kleinenberg came on to power through "This is Miami" and then we turned our full attention to Armin Van Buuren who almost killed me with his beats, literally, I had to leave because I almost passed out in the crowd. Let's see who else...Oh Nero performed and then I sat and watched Underworld completely kill the people who were on Acid.
And then, for the finale, Deadmau5 came on.
I honestly will not be able to describe the amount of euphoric ecstasy that I felt during this show. I met a really nice tall boy from California who let me sit on his shoulders during his show...and of all songs to open with, he opened with 'Some Chords.' As soon as he opened with that I KNEW I was supposed to be at Ultra. For those of you that make fun of me for talking like this, bite me, because this is what I live for. There are few songs that bring me to a completely paralyzing state, and Deadmau5 happens to spin two of them. Then I got down and jammed on my feet for a minute...and then...THEN, the beginning of "Raise Your Weapon" started. My new friend grabbed me and threw me on his shoulders, and as soon as that first beat dropped, I BURST into tears. The combination of the lights, the music, and the crowd was too much for me. I wasn't crying because I saw Deadmau5, I think the power of the atmosphere just overwhelmed me. I was so much higher than everyone else, and looking around at all of the 60,000 people that were gathered together for a union of listening to the same music was unbelievably powerful. I turned around and through the lights I saw a sea of people, everyone's eyes closed and feeling the music together. I hadn't cried in so long, and when Raise Your Weapon came on...it just felt so right for that moment. I honestly felt as though the music reached inside of me and cradled my soul. And it was the best feeling in the world.
For that one moment every single fear, worry, complaint, anxiety and thought left my head. It was just me and the music. You know that feeling when you are freezing cold and you get into a hot bath, and as you put yourself in the water limb by limb you get chills because the warmth of the bath feels so good...and you love how the water takes over your body step by step? That's exactly how I felt with the music of Deadmau5. Every part of my head and body was completely consumed by the syncopation of the lights and music. Plus the fact that you are surrounded by so many people who are feeling the exact same way...it's just all too much. It was by far one of the most spiritual encounters with music I've ever had. I thank God every day that I am able to hear music the way that I do. I don't need to roll, or trip, or get wasted, I'm defected enough where I can be sober and feel like I'm in Heaven with certain typed of music.
Then he played I Remember, which I hadn't heard in so long, and it was so beautiful hearing it live. And then for his encore, he played the song I blogged about, HR8938 Cephai. It was unreal. AND Tommy Lee made a gust appearance on the drums for when Sophie came on to sing 'Sophie Needs a Ladder' and 'One Trick Pony.' How sick is that? Thank you Deadmau5, for reminding me of the reason I keep listening and writing about music.

Gumshoe

Trevor McFedries, aka DJ Skeet Skeet (28,000+ followers on twitter) messaged me about his girl Gumshoe who just came out with a new video for her cover of Brandy's "What About Us." I watched, fell in love with this girls voice, unique style and bald head, and decided that I would love to get to know more about her, ask her some questions and put up the video. I honestly like her version of this song more than Brandy's, and the reggae beat that's going on in the song does it well for me. She is a SWEETHEART, completely humble, and has a pretty sick fashion blog. >> gummelove

Gumshoe met Trevor at one of his eat skeet parties in LA, where Gumshoe was born and raised. She's hoping to become part of a family of creative minds, where Trevor is most certainly helping that take place. She's a young thing, only 24, and shaved her head only a couple months ago. (Best. Decision. Ever - the girl looks rockin.)Her nose ring rules.. represent nose rings!! She says her style and music work as one because she has nothing to hide, it's all full of clarity, and it's simple; but completely free and honest. Which is how I feel her music is as well. Her voice is enough to do everything for a song. Sweet sound this girl has. Anyway, here is her video "What About Us" - enjoy!
follow her on twitter: @okGumShoe

Preparation Ultra

Firstly, let me apologize for my ridiculous absence from the blog.
Sorrryyyyy.

Okay Ultra Fest Miami is this weekend, and I would probably cut out my eye if I could go. I'm banking on one last resort (my sister who spoils me) and hoping that she'll understand how long I have been waiting (my whole life) to go to Ultra and be my savior. ANYWAY. There are so many freaking new remixes out by the DJs who are spinning at Ultra to hype people up, and it's starting to stress me out. I almost had a panic attack today when I stumbled through an unnamed blog through hypem and saw about 30 different remixes added TODAY. I can't handle this through a computer, I just need to experience it all live. And I don't have enough time to go through all of these remixes, plus a lot of them are like...very basic and not that exciting and they seem like they didn't really take that much time to be put together....(no offense, actually, yeah take offense and fix it.) But I did collect some decent ones, and hopefully I'm listening to these getting myself psyched up for a reason....come on Kate pull through.

MSTRKRFT - Beards Again



MSTRKRFT!!! Oh my goodness, I have not heard anything new from them in far too long of time. I was SO excited when I saw this, the song is great, and there's a pretty sick transition in the song. They were by far the best show I have ever been to. Over the year or so I've collected a couple of Death from Above 1979 songs, which I have previously blogged, but MSTRKRFT being back in action helped complete my week. If I get to go to Ultra I will see them thereee! Check out a sweet interview with JFK here.

Professor Green - Monster (Camo & Krooked Remix)



I mean it's okay. I like Professor Green, and this remix is pretty hard. The beginning is nice and easy, and I feel as though maybe they should have controlled the drop a little bit better, but this is definitely good dubstep.

Benny Benassi feat. T. Pain - Electroman (Congorock remix)



You may like the original the best, but after listening to like the 70+ remixes that stemmed from it, this one became my favorite. Absolutely amazing build up, totally gets you revved up, and the drop is decent, second one is better, especially when they ad the drum beat.

Lady Gaga - Baby I Was Born This Way (Dada Life Remix)



THIS is what I'm freaking talking about when I am looking for a song to stoke you out for a festival like Ultra. The first drop is okay, but the SECOND DROP. HOLY MOTHER. It's one of the most exciting build ups and releases I have heard in quite a minute. Almost ALMOST comparable to the Fenech Soler remix to Hollywood by Marina and the Diamonds. Almost.

Avicii - ID


I don't know why this is so short. But it's suuuuper good feeling, and makes me want to dance super badly.

Deadmau5 - HR 8938 Cephei



This is freaking long. But this is the shit I would die to see live. Just being surrounded by a ton of people with the beats taking over your body and the lights matching up. UGH, I would die.

Deadmau5 vs Far East Movement - Ghosts on a G6 (Basic Physics Remix)



Well the first vid I saw from last years Ultra had the Ghosts and Stuff song to it, and I always had a weak spot for the beat of G6. So them being mashed together made me extremely excited.

Post Xanax

Mt. Eden feat. Ruby Frost - Oh That I Had



I love this song. It's so beautiful, and it makes me want to cry. I want to listen to this while I am running away.

I tried to watch the Virgin Suicides last night for the first time since I saw it in highschool. I could't do it. I couldn't even watch what used to be one of my favorite movies. As soon as the scene opened and she dropped the Holy card, that was it for me. I don't know why I am still so sensitive, it's over and done with, but I still have so much guilt and anxiety. I pray every day that it goes away, and I believe it is. It's going away a little too slowly, but I feel it moving.
Which brings me to my next point. I've had at least five people come up to me at school telling me that I look happier. What the hell does that mean? I don't think I will ever be a "happy person" but I suppose it's nice to have going on right now. I do have a new person who I think it contributing highly to my mood. It's nice to have no pre judgements about you and being able to start new. It's really, really nice.

But then the anxiety of school ending and becoming a real live adult sets in. And the I remember that I still want to move somewhere where nobody knows who I am, and I can pretend to be anyone I want to be.
I want to go far away. Very far away.

I want to be in places like this.

I need to pierce something or dye something or recreate myself somehow.

Reblogged from Tumblr's errrwhere.